The Bible makes it clear that our words have power. Proverbs 18:21 says that death and life are in the power of the tongue. Our words contain the power to do good, or evil. We can choose to use our words to uplift and benefit others, or we can use our words to hurt others and put them down. In a world where sinful uses of the tongue are becoming more and more normalized, it's essential we learn how to tame our tongue so that we can best serve the kingdom of heaven.
The language of the world:
When you look around the world, it's easy to see how words are used in harmful ways. At school or work, some people may constantly swear or gossip. On social media, hateful comments and harsh judgments are common. Even the news can spread false stories meant to mislead or provoke anger. This kind of negative and harmful speech has unfortunately become normalized in today's world, but as Christians, we're called to be different. Negative and evil speech is a way of the world, and as Christians we need to make a conscious and intentional effort to separate ourselves from that.
“Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For everything in the world — the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride in one’s possessions — is not from the Father, but is from the world” (1 John 2:15-16).
As this verse says, we should not love the world or the ways of the world. This includes the evil ways of the tongue. We need to leave this sinful and unrighteous language behind, and instead use our words fully for good, and the benefit of others. Obviously we will never be perfect at this, but what matters is making the effort to be better.
Why is taming your tongue important?
"Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit" (Proverbs 18:21).
"There is one who speaks rashly, like a piercing sword; but the tongue of the wise brings healing" (Proverbs 12:18).
These verses both give some insight into the effect our words can have. The tongue is powerful, and because of that it can do great things, but it can also do great harm. Our words, once spoken, can’t be undone. Our words can have huge and permanent impacts, whether it be healing or hurt. That is why being careful with what we say, and taming the tongue is so important.
How to tame your tongue:
'Brood of vipers! How can you say good things when you are evil? For the mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart. A good person produces good things from his storeroom of good, and an evil person produces evil things from his storeroom of evil. I tell you that on the day of judgment people will have to account for every careless word they speak. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned”’ (Matthew 12:34-37).
To tame our tongue, we first need to examine our hearts. As this verse says, “the mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart”, meaning that if our hearts are filled with hatred or contempt, we are more likely to speak hatred and contempt. As humans born into this wicked world we inherently have these evil things in our hearts. Pride, anger, bitterness, jealousy, and more evil can sit in our hearts. When we feel anger or something triggers us, our words can overflow from the inherently evil ways of our heart, and we can say things we don't want to. This also works the other way around, if our hearts are filled with love and compassion, we will speak more love and compassion. Because of this, taming the tongue isn't just about watching what we say, it's also about letting God work inside of you, and to shift your heart completely towards Him. We will obviously never be perfect at this due to the nature of this world, but what matters is the consistent effort to try and grow.
“My dear brothers and sisters, understand this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger” (James 1:19).
The most important part of taming the tongue, and just living in general, is exercising good self-control. Now this is easier said than done, but with help from God, and dedication to improvement, we can get better at it. James 1:19 says that we should be slow to speak. If we speak whatever comes to our mind, we will often say things we’ll regret, but if we take our time, think before we speak, and exercise good self-control, we can ensure we only say what is righteous.
What exactly is righteous speech?
Thankfully the Bible gives us plenty of examples and verses of how we should speak.
“The tongue that heals is a tree of life, but a devious tongue breaks the spirit“ (Proverbs 15:4).
“The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence” (Proverbs 10:11).
“No foul language should come from your mouth, but only what is good for building up someone in need, so that it gives grace to those who hear” (Ephesians 4:29).
If we look at all of these verses we can get a good idea of how God wants us to use our words. The power of our tongues should be used to heal and lift others up, to give grace and love to others. The mouth of the righteous should be a fountain of life, showing others the same grace and love that Jesus shows us.
What's to come
The goal of this article was to teach you the basics of what it means to tame the tongue. This article will be the first of many talking about this topic. The goal at the end of this series is to have you fully equipped to use your words for good, and to serve the kingdom of heaven with your tongue.
Up next in the series: Taming the Tongue - Pt.2: The Problems of Swearing, Gossip, and Lying
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